Incidentally, if people want to see more male “fan service” (for lack of a better term), just let me know that it’s wanted.
Yup yup yup. :-)
“It’s a clever lettuce, then.”
“Hardly,” she said with a delicate snort. “Why would anything clever think it’s a lettuce?”
“Even if it is a lettuce?” I asked. “Especially then,” she said. “Bad enough to be a lettuce. How awful to think you are a lettuce too. Patrick Rothfuss (via damatris)
Anonymous said: "Do you hit on people when they would rather not be hit on?" Well, I try not to. But due to the prevalence of storylines like the one in EGS right now, I am forced to conclude that women _never_ like to be hit on. This has led to a very lonely life. I try as hard as I can to be polite, but when one must necessarily withdraw 100% at the slightest hint of any response other than enthuiastic affirmation, one looks, and feels, pathetic. When SHOULD people hit on other people? What's the line?
It’s possible I’m about to embarrass myself trying to give a good answer to this, BUT I WILL TRY.
There is no easy answer for knowing precisely when one should flirt with someone else. It’s possible one needs to be willing to risk some embarrassment in that regard.
Larry’s case isn’t exactly about that, though, and there’s a reason I keep using the expression “hitting on” instead of “flirting”. In my mind, even if not true outside of it, there is a distinction between trying to pick up someone and flirting with them.
Larry sat down at a card game tournament where the social expectation is courtesy and respect between people as they play card games (trash talking exempt from this expectation), and he immediately opened with a tired pickup line instead of getting to know Sarah naturally and getting a feel for who she is and what she may or may not be interested in.
It’s (theoretically) possible there could have been some natural chemistry, and that’s one of the reasons I feel there’s no easy answer. There isn’t a checklist one can follow to know “now is the time when the flirting will be acceptable”. One has to pay attention, think, and have empathy to sort it all out.
That said, tired pick up lines and such prrrrrrobably aren’t the way to go. People are people, though, and it’s entirely possible someone other than Sarah would have actually liked this sort of attention. I don’t, however, think simply assuming someone would in this situation is a good idea. Pretty sure that would be more the exception than the rule.
As for when people should hit on other people right off the bat like that, there are situations in which single people gather specifically with the intent of meeting other single people. I don’t think comic shops usually fit that description.
IF they were at a bar or party hitting on someone blatantly is slightly more socially acceptable, but it would still be awkward doing it like that.
For straight guys who don’t get it a good analogy is selling stuff. If I sell cars, and I go up to you at a car sales lot it is socially acceptable and possibly welcome, but I still shouldn’t be a dick about it. If I try to sell you a car while we’re playing a card gaame that is weird and annoying.
Now imagine random people trying to sell you cars on the street every day, and calling you a filthy biker if you don’t want their car….
Apologies for making this EVEN LONGER, but I like these words this person typed.
Continuing the car-salesman analogy: Bars and parties are the equivalent of, say, a car dealership. Lots of people are there to buy cars! Assuming someone might be interested in hearing your sales pitch is normal. It’s totally okay to inquire as to whether they are interested in the car you’re selling.
But some people are also just there for a tune-up, or to get a feel for what is currently available on the market without buying. Some people are just there to lend a friend or family member their perspective on cars they might be interested in. Some of them are probably stressed and tired; maybe they were recently in an accident and are here to get their car fixed and it’s expensive, and the absolute last thing they need is you getting in their face and not letting up when they tell you they’re not buying a car today. Just because someone is in a space where a lot of cars are being sold, that does not necessarily mean they want to buy a car. Harassing them won’t change that, it just makes you a complete asshole.
Oh! And it has nothing to do with the car you’re selling! “I’m not shopping for a car today” is not the same thing as “The car you, personally, are selling disgusts me and you should feel ashamed to even be seen with it in public.” It just means the person is not interested in car-buying. It was a simple mistake to make, and the proper response is not “What’s wrong with my car, huh? What, you think you’re too good for this car?!” The proper response is “Oh! My mistake. I thought you looked interested in the car. Sorry! Good luck that thing you’re doing and have a nice day.” And then you politely move on to someone who might actually be interested in being sold a car.
It really is that simple.
This keeps getting bigger and there’s another one I’m tempted to reblog, too. I might have to just make a post with links if this keeps up ^^;
I’ve said this before and I’ll point it out again -
Menstruation is caused by change in hormonal levels to stop the creation of a uterine lining and encourage the body to flush the lining out. The body does this by lowering estrogen levels and raising testosterone.
Or, to put it more plainly “That time of the month” is when female hormones most closely resemble male hormones. So if (cis) women aren’t suited to office at “That time of the month” then (cis) men are NEVER suited to office.
If you are a dude and don’t dig the ladies around you at their time of the month, just think! That is you all of the time.
And, on a final note, post-menopausal (cis) women are the most hormonally stable of all human demographics. They have fewer hormonal fluctuations of anyone, meaning older women like Hilary Clinton and Elizabeth Warren would theoretically be among the least likely candidates to make an irrational decision due to hormonal fluctuations, and if we were basing our leadership decisions on hormone levels, then only women over fifty should ever be allowed to hold office. timemachineyeah (via ask-pauli-amorous)